The Starling Girl (2023): Reclaiming Agency in the Shadow of Purity Culture

Written By Kiki Grace

In this episode of Sex, Bodies, and Cinema, Jason and Ashley dive into Laurel Parmet’s The Starling Girl (2023), a coming-of-age drama about Jem Starling (played by Eliza Scanlen), a 17-year-old navigating her place in a repressive Christian fundamentalist community. The film takes a bold look at sexuality, autonomy, and the clash between religious doctrine and personal desires, especially when Jem becomes entangled in a secret relationship with her youth pastor, Owen (Louis Pullman).

Trigger Warning: This episode discusses themes of consent, sexual awakening, and spiritual repression that may be triggering or sensitive for some listeners.

Hosts:

  • Jason Goode is a Somatic Sex Educator and Somatic Performance Coach. Learn more about his work and offerings at somarelating.ca.

  • Ashley Rose is a Sexological Bodyworker & intimacy coach who specializes in internal pelvic care. Visit her website at ashleyelisabethrose.ca for resources, workshops, and private coaching.

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Topics Discussed:

  • [00:17] Introduction to the film and its exploration of the tension between faith, sexuality, and self-discovery.

  • [03:00] Ashley and Jason’s initial reactions to the film’s nuanced portrayal of characters and themes.

  • [10:00] The role of religion and purity culture in shaping Jem's identity and sexual experiences.

  • [17:30] The chemistry between Jem and Owen and the dynamics of power and consent in their relationship.

  • [25:00] The impact of the church environment on Jem's sense of autonomy and her body.

  • [35:00] Exploring the spiritual and emotional isolation created by rigid religious structures.

  • [45:00] The conversation about consent, the confusion around sexuality, and the dangers of religious purity standards.

  • [55:00] The film's ending: Jem’s path toward reclaiming her agency and stepping into her own future.

  • [1:05:00] A reflection on how The Starling Girl challenges the portrayal of fundamentalist communities in film and its empathy for the characters.

Additional Resources:

  • Hellbound? (Documentary) by Kevin Miller
    Find it on IMDb: Hellbound?
    Purchase it here: Hellbound? DVD

  • Shameless by Rev. Nadia Bolz-Weber
    Jason recommends this book as an insightful exploration of sexuality and spirituality. Learn more: Shameless by Rev. Nadia Bolz-Weber

  • The Wheel of Consent by Betty Martin: a foundational framework for understanding giving, receiving, and consent. Watch her videos on YouTube: Betty Martin's YouTube Channel

  • The Erotic Mind by Jack Morin: an excellent resource for those exploring their sexuality in more depth. It offers insight into how shame and repression, often rooted in religious or societal frameworks, affect our sexual development and self-awareness. Find it HERE: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/174777.The_Erotic_Mind

About the Podcast:

Sex, Bodies, and Cinema explores films that tackle taboo subjects related to sex, embodiment, and intimacy. Co-hosts Jason Goode and Ashley Rose bring their expertise in somatic sex education and filmmaking to spark thought-provoking discussions.

Produced by: Jason Goode
Editing and Mixing by: Taqi
Music from: #Uppbeat – "Ultraviolet"
License code: D1XMKMHAULTCPFSC

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Kiki Grace https://www.somahealing.ca
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